Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Looking Back

To my surprise, when I opened my latest issue of Creating Keepsakes magazine and flipped the page to the sketch column I instantly recognized the sketch. It was from this layout that I did in August 2008 from this post back when I was doing one of my page a day runs and then it was published in a CK special issue. Since I didn't get credit for it in the magazine I thought I would give it to myself here. :)


And I thought I would share the story of this layout since I didn't back then.

One thing that I was looking forward to when Drew was born was the thought of sharing my family's love for racing with him. I imagined him experiencing all the fun and exciting times watching his Grandpa race, just like I had as a kid. I just knew that he was going to grow an amazing bond with his Grandpa because of racing. I imagined Drew waving those silly plastic checkered flags and eating stale nachos, a race track staple, just like I did as a kid. I imagined him feeling that same nervous excitement that bubbles up in your stomach when his Grandpa pulled out on the track, just like I did. I imagined all the new memories we were going to build at that muddy playground.

None of that ever happened though. Drew's first race, at just a month old, also happened to be my Dad's last. Dad got sick that night after his race. He got out of his car and blacked out. He hadn't been feeling good and decided that it was time to hang up his racing helmet. I never thought that day would come. I didn't think it would last and figured he would take the rest of the season off and pick it up the next. At the time I thought my dad would race until the day he died. I had no idea that he was close to that day.

Four months later he died.

The only race that Drew has been to since then is his Grandpa's memorial race and if it wasn't for Disney's Cars he probably wouldn't know squat about racing. It still, four and a half years later, bothers me that he won't have that experience in his life.

11 comments:

Amy from KC said...

Ok first, I saw that sketch in the magazine and my first thought was that they had gotten you to do the sketch column. I was thrilled, because that would be great! Nope...couldn't find your name anywhere. Huh, thought it sure did look like your style and seemed familiar...it was weird. The rest of the issue...and that cover layout...oh dear.

Now, about your layout story. You had me in tears. My dad died in 2001 about 6 weeks after being diagnosed with cancer. My son was born in 2005, and there are so many things that he would have done with him that he will never know. Children loved my father, and there always seemed to be a little kid hanging around on our back deck waiting for "Mr. Morgan to come out and play." My dad hunted pheasant and quail, and he always had a couple of bird dogs. My Nathan would have been his sidekick, running the dogs with him and walking fence rows on a frosty autumn morning, field stubble crunching beneath their boots. Nathan will never know that joy. It's not that I wanted him to be a hunter; I wanted him to have that relationship with his grandfather. Nathan has no idea what he is missing...but I do.

Amy said...

Beautiful layout and what a touching story, brought a tear to my eye as I read it.

dawn said...

I remember this layout and how sad it was to read. Well, it's still sad today. I'm sure your dad and boys would have been the best of buddies. So sorry for your family's loss. Keep telling the boys his story and showing his pictures and maybe one day they will surprise you and want to do some car racing just like your dad. Sending you hugs!!!

Heather said...

Allison, tears are rolling down my face. What an awesome page to have to be able to share with the boys for the rest of their lives. Your stories and memories of your dad will live on forever!
You deserve a lot of credit for that page! ;-)
Heather

Luv2talk said...

This is why we scrap. These storybooks we are creating will hold our memories for us long after the moment passes.

Thanks for sharing yours.

Ginny said...

First, CK is messed up! Second, my dad lost his battle to cancer when my second son was 4 weeks old. Bittersweet memories for sure! Thanks for sharing this LO again!

Melanie said...

This story is so special! It's so sad, yet your dad can always be a hero for your boys.

That is awful you weren't given credit in the magazine. I'm finding that more often than not, especially with sketches and kits. Credit should be given for a design that was from a sketch, a scraplift, or for a kit where someone else matched the products up.

goldyfish said...

Your dad was so special to all of the family. I still have a toy that he made me when I was little. He was always such fun to be around. I really hate that we didn't get to spend much time together growing up. I am so glad to see how good you are doing and know that your dad is in heaven looking down smiling at all you girls have accomplished.

Allison Davis said...

It is so hard when you lose a relative and think about what your kids are missing out on. It kills me that my kids won't know my dad. Another great reason why we all scrapbook. It gives us a chance to bring those that aren't here a voice and a chance for our children to know them through our eyes. I'm so sorry for those of you that have lost someone. Group hug to you all!

ShellyJ said...

CK really messed up with not crediting you! ... and thanks for sharing your touching story.

Laurel said...

Hi Ali- I search the magazine for your layouts everymonth. I didn't notice it didn't have your name but didn't matter. I knew it was yours, we get to know the people in the photos and your style! I had to squint to reach the very touching story about your father. You should know that there are many of us each month that are waiting to see what layouts of yours are going to be in the magazine. You should be in there more!! I get so much inspiration from your layouts. I need to take some photos to share with you all the versions I've done.